None of us have gotten through life without going through some shit. And that shit can sometimes linger with us even after days and weeks have past. So in order to try and make sure our todays are as bright as they can be, it’s important that we reflect on how we got there and learn to really love our entire journey no matter how weird, uncomfortable or shitty that it was. So take look at this lovely list of ways that you can do just that!
- Stop judging it. That’s right, it’s done. It’s over with. Every time you spend your energy today lamenting upon the past, casting judgments on what happened, you’re robbing your today. Leave it there. Recognize what it is that you have learned and stop judging it. See it for the only thing that it is – the past.
- Stop playing the ‘what if’ game. Remember number one? Well often these two bad habits go hand in hand. You look in the past, judge it and label it as ‘wrong’ or ‘not good enough’ and then spend hours thinking about ‘what if next time you did this’ or ‘what if you just knew that how it would all be different. When we get caught up in ‘what if’ thinking we are often trying to judge how we can change things for next time. Well just stop that my dear. You’re robbing yourself of your today by spending energy on both the past AND the future right now.
- Fuck the shoulds. That’s right. Any single statement that has ‘should’ or ‘shouldn’t’ in it just has to go. Those statements typically indicate that we’re veering off of our true path because our default state is to do what WE want. But society often has us thinking about all the things we “SHOULD” or “SHOULDN’T” do and society doesn’t have to live with the consequences of you taking action against your damn will.
- Practice Forgiveness or Fuck That. Lemme explain this one. Life includes shittiness and sometimes that shittiness is you. Other times it is others. When others wrong you, practice forgiveness. When it’s you, offer an apology. If those things don’t go as planned then say “fuck that” and let it go.
- Release guilt and shame. I feel like I make this recommendation every month. This practice of releasing guilt and shame is so flipping powerful. Those two emotions tend to also be associated with our number one here. Meaning, once we judge, we often have an emotional response to it and that can lead to guilt and shame. Remember what I said about that shits in the past? Well guess what? It’s still there. Release those emotions. Let them flow right through you and get right back to living today.
- Focus on peace. MOST of these items on here have to do with the past, because for whatever reason so many of us just love to hang out there rather than today. But if you start to focus your decisions today on, “what will bring me the most peace?” you will be amazed how little time you’ll have to spend judging…what if-ing…forgiving or releasing guilt and shame.
- Be curious. Here’s another one that is great for really enjoying your journey today. BE curious. Take on a mentality of wonderment and awe. When you start to look at everything with a curious mind, your journey will naturally start to turn into an adventure!
- Find a friend to help reframe. When in doubt, when none of the above really seems to be working for ya, reach out to a friend and ask them to reframe what you’re getting stuck on. Maybe you’re missing something. Maybe there is a lightbulb that you need turned on for you. I mean, if that’s not one of the reasons why we all stick together…then it damn well should be!
Phew, I think 8 may be one of the longer lists that I’ve written. But this topic is SO flipping important. By really finding love along the way of our entire journey, we create not just a life that we can love living today, but also a life that we can look back on and love.
Can you think of any other ways you may be able to love your past?