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Deepest Spirituality Podcast Season 1 Episode 6: Unveiling the Mysteries of Existence with AmaJean

Joining us today is a spiritual family member, AmaJean, who will guide us on this profound exploration.

Prepare for an intense discussion that knows no bounds. We dare to question why we are here, delving into the depths of existence itself. This is no ordinary inquiry, my friend.

As we embark on this mind-bending odyssey, be ready for your mind to expand, your perspective to shift, and the boundaries of your understanding to be shattered. This is the essence of our exploration – unraveling the mysteries at the core of our existence.

So, my fellow truth-seekers, join us as we venture into the abyss of the unknown. Together, we will navigate the vast expanse of existence, attempting to grasp the ungraspable, define the undefinable, and uncover the profound truths that lie hidden within. Are you ready to embark on this extraordinary journey? Let’s dive headfirst into the depths of our own being and explore the enigma of existence itself.

Sunshine: Welcome everyone to I believe this is the sixth episode of the  Deepest Spirituality podcast. We are you are here with the co host me Sunshine, the pink haired psychic medium

Devin: And Devin, the mindful mage in mind and in spirit.

Sunshine: It’s been a minute since we’ve recorded. To remind you, Devin, the mindful mage, I also want to remind anyone that is hearing this, you know, maybe after maybe just stumbled upon this, go check out more episodes, right? This is not the only one that is out there, we are exploring some crazy, incredible topics. 


So I just want to remind you, maybe even like, just pause this jump on over there like, you know, add us into your library or something of that nature. 


So you don’t miss out on anything else that we may share. But just want to remind you for that, I am going to introduce our topic, our topic for today is pretty, pretty intense. Not gonna lie. And we are joined by a friend, you know, in a spiritual family member that is very near and dear to both Devin and I’s heart, AmaJean here. So AmaJean, thank you for joining us here today.

AmaJean: Yeah, thank you for having me. I’m super excited. Yeah,

Sunshine:  You asked the question. Why are you here? So we’re going to basically explore the question of existence, I guess.


AmaJean: No big deal. Just a little question that occurs to some people sometimes.

Sunshine: Every now and again. But of course, before we dive into that, I want everyone here to get settled in, strap up. If you are out and you are able to close your eyes, right and in a safe place that you’re not going to injure anything, I’d encourage you maybe even to close your eyes during this. If you are driving or need to like be paying attention, please don’t do it. Be safe, be smart. Because we are now going to have Devin lead us into the beautiful opening ritual for our podcast, Devin, if you can do us a favor and take it away

Devin: Sure thing. Wherever you are, it doesn’t matter what you’re doing. If you can safely pause, get comfortable. And let’s take a few deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth low and deep. About three. On your final breath, taking one more give a big sigh

notice any points in your body that are holding tension and gently shake it out. Allow yourself to become as comfortable as possible, right here right now. And if your eyes aren’t already closed, you can close them now if it’s safe to do so.


I invite you to imagine high above you. Almost higher than you can imagine is a star as the star appears to you, in your mind’s eye, notice the color, the size the sound and notice how you feel now that this star is in your perception. And I invite you now to imagine that this star is a symbol of your higher self imagine that this star sends down from high high above a beam of light directly down down down into the crown of your head all the way down through your neck and your spinal cord to the very central column of your body dealing you with this higher self starlight

and when you can feel that now, feeling that deep connection to this higher self star you can say out loud with me, I am now connected to my higher self. my higher self, I’m now connected to my higher self, very good, my higher self. 


Taking a deep breath into that and allowing that higher self star light, that pure cosmic energy to radiate outwards from your spinal cord through every nerve in your body touching every part of your body. And Now bring your attention back to your star high above you. And imagine right next to your star is another star, noticing the color, the size, the sound of this star and the feeling.


And I invite you to imagine now that this second star is a symbol of my higher self. And you can see connected to that star is the same kind of brilliant chord of light. And that’s connected to me wherever I happen to be in this moment. And now we’re going to do something special, we’re going to connect these higher self stars together. So as I count from one to three, let’s both imagine a similar beam of light connecting our higher self stars together. And after the count is three we can say together, our higher selves are now connected, one sending out that beam of light to just about to meet in the middle three. our higher selves are now connected; their sounds just notice how that feels. Have this connection taking a deep breath into that

and now for my favorite part. 


You can see both of our stars together. I’d like you to imagine zooming out now. So that you can see countless stars just like these but each unique in its own way. A whole universe full of stars and many of these stars are connected to the listeners of this podcast soul family perhaps. Now with your next deep breath, I’d like you to imagine connecting our higher self stars every other star in this universe I will be silent as you do this and taking one more deep breath, letting it out with a big sigh as you do and open your eyes again. If you like gently look around your environment. Allowing your eyes and your head and your body to move in Naturally allowing yourself to feel at home in the present moment, here and now. One big family,

Sunshine: I know I have got to say, you know, we’ve done this, as I said, we’re on the sixth episode. So we’ve done this a handful of times, and every single time I’m just watching this wave of the collective consciousness connect through all of those stars. And it’s just

the lesson.


Devin: Something came through for me to share with our listeners about this practice, about some concerns that may arise about the idea of connecting these parts of ourselves to these parts of other people who we may not actually know. And then like, what if? What if I don’t actually want to connect with them? And how long does this last anyway? Does it go away forever?


 So from my perspective, our higher selves are always connected anyway. Because we’re all always connected anyway. That’s the nature of things. So for me, this little practice of actively imagining connecting our higher selves together simply serves as an invitation, a symbolic act, to invoke whatever a connection to your higher self means to you. For me, that means access to greater and deeper knowledge and wisdom about who I am, why I’m here, which is the topic of this episode. And a feeling of belonging, a feeling of being home, wherever I am, in my body, in my mind, in my spirit, in my little Devin shaped pocket of the universe. 


And so connecting my higher self, with your higher self, and with all the other higher selves, it really doesn’t change much at the macroscopic level, the macrocosmic level, it’s all connected. So really, what we are inviting into our human experience by doing this practice, is community, interconnection, harmony, access to deeper compassion, unconditional love, and understanding, and more importantly, appreciation for what it means to be human in this life, and how sacred and important and challenging and honorable that really is, to serve as a human being, at this time, in our evolution as a, an intelligent, collective consciousness. 


So that’s what that all means to me. Does it go away? Yes, everything goes away. So you can do this practice on your own as often as you’d like to renew that connection. Or you can let it go. If you really don’t like the idea of connecting your higher self to other people’s higher selves, that’s fine, too. And I’d speak to that a little bit.

Sunshine: I love that. And I think we have talked about it maybe in our first episode when he did it, but I think it’s a great reminder. And what it reminded me of is, if you if anybody listening has ever looked up the 12 Laws of the Universe, the very first one is we are all connected. And as I looked them up, one of them that did come out, it was the law of correspondence, which is our outer world is a reflection of our inner inner world. So that exercise is that it’s taking our inner selves, and allowing this connection to understand that there is something outside of us. 

That actually has a role in our own world, our own inner selves. So it’s beautiful. 


I love the exercise every time and as you said, when we are connected to the collective consciousness when we are recognizing and acknowledging it, I think very many people that do are going to stumble at some point to the exact same questions that are lovely and dear AmaJean is asking us to explore today, which is, why am I even here? Right? But before we do that, so that we can know, right, our listeners can kind of know a little bit of your perspective of why you might even be asking this question, right? AmaJean, you share a little bit about who you are, and maybe even what makes it what makes it a challenging question for you to kind of answer.

AmaJean: Yeah, sure. Um, I’m just gonna start talking and trust that the right things will come out, because who I am is a really large question. Um, so just last night, I did an escape room with my husband and children and in laws, and was really hit with the insight that like, I’m here to get out of the escape room, and have a great time doing it. I’m the Game Master. You know, this, this franchise of escape rooms, calls the people that watch over you and give you help if you need it, the Game Master, so they’re kind of like your spirit guide. And mine was named Bowie. Which the two of you know that David Bowie is very significant to me as a spirit guide type of figure. And I just, I could not I will never get over it. Like all of the synchronicities that ever happened to me. I never the shine never wears off, I never get over it. And I was so delighted by this yesterday evening. And so I think it kind of like today, I’m in the mood to say that who I am, is I’m a game player, like, I just really am a being that enjoys the sensation, and the fun of mysteries of looking around a space or a situation and like, not having a clue, like what the fuck to make of it, until something all of a sudden jumps out and starts to make everything else make sense. And that is really what I live for. Like, I now understand that I am really just somebody who is here for a good time. It’s really just about that simple, and also infinitely more complex. Who I am individually, as an individual, which I know is a joke, but also a truth in the game is somebody who has just jumped around a lot, I’ve moved a ton. I have had a lot of communities, friendships. I’ve I have one side of my family that I’m less connected to that is large and expansive. And one side of my family that I’m more connected to that is quite small and close knit. And I’ve lived near them I’ve lived far from them. I’ve been married and divorced and remarried, I have had so many close friendships that I do my best to maintain. And sometimes like recently, like nearly a decade had elapsed between the time that I last heard from one of my best friends when she reached out to me and offered to buy me a Taylor Swift ticket to the era’s tour because why not? Because I had bought her ticket to the Fearless Tour in 2009. So I mentioned these things because I feel like they give a good sense of like, I am connected to a lot of people and a lot of places. And my awareness of that, as I’ve moved through my seemingly random grab bag of a life has made itself really apparent to me that like, this is actually the point. Like I spent a lot of my younger years kind of like feeling like I was here to do something like really important. I was born in an eclipse portal between a solar and lunar eclipse, which I’ve learned I’m an astrologer also, and I’ve learned fairly recently that this is something that people born in Eclipse portals often feel is that like they’re really here like for something but they don’t know what it is. They often don’t know what it is, especially in their younger years. And so I think that I spent I’ve spent a lot of my life feeling like a failure, or like I was really hard on myself for a long time for like not having the attention span or the motivation or the follow through to you know, finish a novel, or, you know, make my first marriage work, I went into that as most people in their 20s go into it thinking like, I’m only going to do this once and therefore saw myself kind of as a failure when I realized that that was not going to continue to be the healthiest thing for me. And now, finally, I had a very jarring, shocking kind of Kundalini awakening, I now know that term, I did not know it at the time that it happened, which made it all the more frightening experience in December of 21, slash January of 22. And that has really transformed everything for me, how I see myself moving forward, how I see myself in this present moment, and how I see my past. It’s helped me understand that there is no past or future that everything is actually all happening simultaneously. And our consciousness is moving through space time experiencing it. So yeah, I’m a game player and an experiencer. And hopefully a gainer of wisdom. And ultimately, just a lover, like I see myself as somebody who is here to love. And I see love very broadly as being like the force of all life of all that is underneath all that is, and that we’re really just here to kind of like, gather more of it by just bringing our consciousness to the fact that it’s already there.

Sunshine: I want to thank you. I mean, many of the things that you said are things that I know and all the reasons why I adore you, right? You know, playing the game, not everyone is comfortable playing the game. Right? A lot of people aren’t. Especially because it’s a game that doesn’t come with instructions or rules.

AmaJean: Like an escape room. You shut the door. And there you are.

Sunshine: Yeah, you just got to figure it out as you go. Yeah, and hopefully, you’ve got a Game Master that you know, otherwise, you’re literally just locked in a room. You are posed a really big question around why are you here? Why do you think I thought it might be interesting for all of us to kind of share our perspective on this? One, why do people ask this question? Is this one of those big questions that are asked? When people are venturing on a spiritual journey? What’s your perspective on that?

AmaJean : I think it’s because life is such a high sensation game. You know, whether the sensation is desirable or not to your ego. It’s a very intense experience, almost inevitably for everyone. And it’s really easy to look from your own lens and decide, well, it’s more intense for some people than others. But, you know, a, that may not be true at all, you don’t really know how someone is experiencing their life, even if it looks perfect to you and B, we live a series of lifetimes, like our energy is really just a frequency that I believe, you know, incarnates repeatedly throughout space time, and you have no idea where someone’s life is falling in the context of all those other lifetimes. But, you know, going back to my main point, it’s high sensation for all of us. And I think eventually, that leads most people to a place of having felt enough, hurt, confusion, shame, guilt, fear, overwhelm, that they’re like, What is the point? Like, why am I here? Because they want and I’m saying they I’m including myself, and they a reason for it all to matter. Like, is this teaching me something of value or like, leading me somewhere where there’s a point, because it just feels like a lot? If there and we know we’re kind of like mentally trained for there to be a point like we all grow up watching TV shows and movies and reading books, where there’s a narrative arc, and we want our lives to have a narrative arc. And I think they do. But I think it’s just way bigger for all of us than we can really comprehend within a single incarnation. Because our narrative arc actually comprises all of our lifetimes. And so really, there is no beginning and no end like in a tidy movie or book, but there’s a circle to it. So there is always often a feeling of rise and fall, because depending on which way you’re looking, you’re always rising and falling, just like the hero in that story. So yeah, I think it’s inevitable that everybody reaches points where they just, it’s almost like you’ve had enough of feeling without any answers.

Sunshine: Yeah, I’ll share and then Devin I’d love to hear because what kept hitting me on it? It’s not just like, to me that it was like, It’s the feeling of the piece, but it’s the change of the feeling. Because if we were all just happy 24/7 Nobody would ever ask why in the world is life so perfect? Right? Like, that’s not it’s the change that really drives that why? Why did I wake up and feel like the work, the day was gonna go? And by five o’clock it’s in the toilet. Why is this happening to me? So that was the change that we experienced in the sensation to me was kind of what really what hit me that where that comes from? Because if we didn’t have this fluctuation of human emotion, happy, sad, if we didn’t have the dual nature of you know, in that universal law that says, you know, when things are good, there also must be things that we can describe as bad. We might not even ask the question why?

AmaJean: Right, like The Truman Show immediately came to mind as like the ultimate experiment and like, kind of proof of that. And that’s fascinating, because, you know, once he realizes the truth is when he starts asking why.

Sunshine: Your thought, What do you think? Why do you think people ask that question?

Devin: Oh. Yeah, to put all this into words, right now is going to be quite fun. Perhaps challenging? Why do we ask that question? Is this? This is a separate? This is a different question than the one that we started with. Right? Yeah. Because why? Why do people ask why?


The first thing that comes to my mind is this satisfaction, which doesn’t need to mean anything. Emotional. Satisfaction is not an emotion. From my perspective. And honestly, if things were always happy all the time, I still think people would be asking why? Because there would be some people who think this is this can’t be all there is there can’t be just happiness. That’s when I started asking why I’ve been asking why for a long time. 


Because I’ve always felt that there is more to this world than what I’ve been told, than what I see and hear and experience people talking about. There’s more than what’s on the surface. That’s why I asked why. And even if it were always happy, someone would eventually become dissatisfied with that, because that’s the nature of the soul. The soul is a changing being. We ask why, because why is a catalyst.


Sunshine: It’s interesting, Devin, because what I’m picturing how popped into my head is the star kind of opening sequence of like, if we weren’t all connected if we didn’t have that, right, then we might not have dreams that are telling us there’s something else we might not have this like knowing we might not have right and so you know, our humaneness if we didn’t have this consciousness connected to all and everything in every time space, you know, as Ahmed Jean has been sharing. 


We may never even be prompted to even ask why on anything. We may just be the Truman Show or you know the robots I mean, maybe maybe that is the big difference between artificial intelligence and human is We have an insatiable urge for why. Right? in all regards, AmaJean, what has you asking that question? You shared it here. You shared some scenarios, you shared some things, I would love it if you kind of maybe help the listeners here understand like, why why is this like such an interestingly difficult question for you to answer?

AmaJean: Yeah, hmm, there’s many directions I could go here. I’m trying to remember where I was at when I wrote those notes. It was a couple of months ago now. And, you know, ever since that spiritual awakening experience that I mentioned, I’ve really been kind of in a weird, Limbo place where I feel like, my friend Amanda says, like, I’m in the void. And I like that, because that’s very much how it feels where I’m like, waiting for something to make itself obvious as, like, go this way. Because most of my life, even though like, like I said, it’s been very much a grab bag of experiences and places and people, the next thing has tended to just make itself clear, and I’ve just kind of slipped from one thing to the next, you know, making a little money when I needed to, like moving when it was obviously time. 


And for the first time in my life, I really feel like I stepped off the edge of something, and I’m still just like, floating or falling, or both. And I’m like, where am I gonna land? Like, what’s going on? I don’t know. And at first, I was really not okay with not knowing. And sometimes I’m still not okay with not knowing. But a lot of things are revealing themselves to me in the void, that are of extremely high value. And maybe when I wrote those notes, even, I didn’t even have the perspective that I have now. Like, I think it’s really interesting, because, you know, every lifetime is karmic. Karma is a word that people love to throw around for whatever purpose. 


But to my understanding, karma is really just the reverberating frequencies of everything you’ve ever done, or will do in any given incarnation, hitting you in the here and now. And so therefore, like, I think some lifetimes are like by design by your own Higher Self design, designed to be kind of tying up various loose ends. And as I look back very recently, it’s kind of hit me that like, Oh, this is a very karmic lifetime, like more so than others in the sense that there are many, many, many other lifetimes that have caught up to me. Many threads from them that were left loose, that are asking for resolution, that are asking me to, like, revisit a place or a relationship, or both, or a situation. And to kind of like, you know, not that there’s any objective right or wrong, but get it right for me, like, get myself aligned within that situation, in a way that my soul did not in the other iterations of it. So when you’re going through that before you really recognize that it can really feel like a big mess, it can feel like, what is going on here? Why so many moving pieces? Why so many? Like, okay, I lived this story for five years done, lived this story for two years done, I live this story, it can be, you know, a lot. 


And so I think when I asked the question, I was probably in a low place of like, like I was initially saying, of just being really tired of the high sensations and no answers. And I’ve been kind of like, brought to a new place of submission over the past month or two, I would say of just, I just feel what I feel. I just love the people that I love. I live where I live, I move when I move, just because, like, just accept that the universe is like operating in a way that I don’t need to have all the answers and just be okay with the sensation that that brings up in my body and just accept it.

Sunshine: I’m curious that I did tell you that I had the this one, a sentiment that you’d kind of shared so maybe you maybe you don’t feel it is true anymore. or maybe it’s not rattling around in your head to like, be curious on but you made a comment. And on the surface, I look like a massive failure and a loser by society’s standards, maybe share a little bit like, do you? Is this still a, you know something that you’re seeing a perspective that people are looking at you? Or maybe share? Why are you expressing that? Why? Why do you feel like people would cast that judgment on you?

AmaJean: So, I mean, I for one thing that was my sense of humor, like, I think it’s very funny when I step out, which, you know, because you know, me, but you know, for anybody listening, that was not me, like speaking from the bottom of like, a depressed place, that was me finding it very hilarious, that I find my life to be so rich and interesting, and sensational, and gorgeous. And I frickin love life. I love it. And so I find it hilarious that, you know, society’s measures, you know, like, having a very long lasting single marriage, having a successful career, making X amount of money, slash like making more money as time progresses, you know, having these benchmarks that you can say to your children have met, having a particular kind of home or car or going on certain trips, like these measures that are pretty common. You know, like, I’ve been divorced, I don’t use my various degrees. I have a bachelor’s degree in Spanish and a Masters of Fine Arts in writing. And I don’t use those at all. i When people ask me what I do, I never quite know what to say. I’ve recently just started saying I raised the frequency in a room. That’s what I do. And people are like, Oh, okay, but that’s like, that’s the truest answer I can give. I just think that my life does not fit the mold. That a lot of people maybe just try to make this fit, maybe none of our lives really should fit into that mold. But I think that was why I said that was just because I’m such an internal mental, communicative dot connecting relational, loving person that I don’t really care about, like, putting in a ton of concerted effort to like, have a thing to like, have a certain income or a certain thing, or, you know, even a certain like, wave being seen, like identity like I am this, and continuing to be that so that I gain respect and like, gravitas and that I just don’t care about any of that.


Sunshine: I find it fascinating. Before we even jump into exploring I thought it might be a little bit of a nice topic for us to touch on and for me to share and then you Devin do your your perspective. This is part of the spiritual journey. Right getting to this point of fuck you I don’t give a shit what anybody else thinks. Yeah, totally. Right. And stop. Stop trying to judge me stop trying to tell me when I am stop trying to give me my benchmarks that trying to give me my milestones, and there’s my life to live. Right. So I you know, I think it’s, I think it’s fabulous you’re exploring with and I like the approach that will I even love the I raised the vibrations of a room, man, I would I would love to be the fly on the wall. Looking at these other individuals faces the moment that you say it in full sincerity. And they’re just like, you know.

AmaJean: I mean, am I wrong? Like you know me. So if you’re gonna ask me, I’m gonna give you my true answer whether you get it or not. 

Sunshine: Devin, I’m curious. From you, like, similar scenario of I mean, I believe this is part of a spiritual journey to kind of get to this point, but what’s your perspective on that?

Devin: I really like the concept. That translates as it seems like or if I feel like I don’t belong in this society, or this world, and no matter how hard I’ve tried to fit myself into it, because I’m here to change it. I’m here to offer something else. And I can from this perspective, on this more macro cosmic perspective of what a life is about and why anyone is here, I can be grateful to the people who are seemingly just playing along and playing by the rules that these different societies and cultures have presented to them. Because they give me contrast, realize, Wow, I really don’t fit into that. That’s actually not who I am at all, I need to go do something completely different. Even if that means totally fucking up by the standards that society has prescribed, to us to live by.


 So I think that’s why I’m here. I think that’s why probably, our listeners are here, if only because they have come to the place of realizing that they don’t really fit into the mold that they were given by their parents or their school, or their society or their religion, or whatever. But then again, that kind of experience of not belonging doesn’t have to be some far out spiritual trip of an experience. I think we all have that experience, to some degree. And if anyone’s being totally honest, I think they would say that they’ve had a similar experience. Of course, it’s a spectrum of how weird and far out and say spiritual experience is, you know, maybe it’s not belonging to a particular group of people in your high school, when you were in grade school. So yeah, I think it’s normal. I think it’s the kind of normal that I want to consider normal.



Sunshine: Yeah. 100% on that one, you know, and we’ve talked about, with our audience, and, you know, our listeners on, on some of the things that connect all of us together and that like, I think this is one of them, right? I think this is a really big one of them that we’re we are we’re trying to understand, you know, we’re seeking to understand, but we don’t want people to tell us how to understand it. Right, we want to be able to explore and discover it on our own. Well, speaking of explore, AmaJean we’ve done sessions before in the past, and I’ll tell you, like as I was prepping for today’s episode, I already started getting guidance and answers and chatting. And someone, one of your guides stepped forward and really gave me kind of an earful and wanted me to start and I asked, “Please, can you not?” Because I want this to be as like real time as we possibly can. Devin, I didn’t I didn’t touch base with this anew on the start. But this thought kind of hit me that it might even be interesting to have you kind of AmaJean. I’m trying to find the answer. Like do a little bit of talk to her to see what comes into mind on her on this, this, this answer to. 


But the question that we’re going to be exploring is, how can I make a gene better explain her role in this world? So I think all of the listeners heard I’m a gene is not like, oh my god, I have no idea how to answer this question. Like, she doesn’t care, it’s not a scented desire. It’s not something like she wakes up pain and suffering because she doesn’t have the answer to this question. She’s actually more frustrated because she doesn’t quite understand like, how can you explain accepting just life on life’s terms? As a point of joy, right? Like, that’s a very hard thing to explain to people like I just love living right? What do you do? I just live every day. I live every day to love it. It’s hard to explain that the the raise the vibration of the room, I think is a good shot, but I thought that would be what we explored is how can ing better explain her role in this world? 


And so for me, I’m just gonna you know, you guys And bear with me, I’m going to tap and ask that question see some of the answers that I get. I know one of them popped up earlier, as I was listening, and we were first starting to talk about it. Before we even started the episode was a mirror, a reflection right? So like, what have you kind of touched on that and some of what you’ve shared of, like, yes, raising the vibration of the room. But also, you know, really being a reflector, right, like a reflection back to those that are around you, so that they can know and understand, right? I am I’m you know, so the answer is like, how do I, I’m everything you need me to be. I am everything you need me to be. 


And so like if somebody needed you just to attend to, you know, watch, you know, watch a TV show and relate to them, because they didn’t quite understand like you would do, it didn’t matter what they need you to show up in the world for that, in essence, is kind of what you would do. But more so even like, that’s interesting, the picture that they just showed me, I don’t know that you even recognize this or have ever witnessed this. And I’m kind of surprised that they’re like, I don’t know about this. They just showed me the tower card that you actually will show up in people’s lives like right before as this reflector that says, Don’t stop. If you aren’t paying attention to this. Watch out. Right? You think you’ve got a mess to clean up? Now? Guess what happens if you don’t try to address it at this point, right? Like, now you’re talking total destruction?

AmaJean: Yeah, I have the tower card and the candle on my Babylon altar. And you know, I’ve got my Babylon star tattoo right here. Got the red hair. So Saul hitting?

Oh, yeah. Like that’s, that’s even the picture that I saw on that one is really kind of interesting of this ugliness and not in Forgive me, because the picture that they’re showing you, they keep all alternating your, you know, your very beautiful face with this, like, really wretched face. And that’s not saying you but like you also have this ability to be able to show the ugliness and reflect it back into someone. So in that regard, like you will be someone’s you know, you know, dream or their nightmare, depending upon how it is that they treat you. Right. And so like, that’s a it’s like, how do you explain how do you explain your role in this world somewhat depends upon the the individual or the circle that you’re like, navigating with your constant like that raise the vibration in the room. What is the saying, then? I just heard it again, I’m not here for a long time, but I’m here for a good time. Right? Like that’s another one of the answers like depending upon, right, that’s the way that you can kind of say I’m raising the vibration in the room to a group of like knuckleheads that will get it right. Like I’m what what do you do for a living? Well, while I’m not here for a good time, but I’m here, you know, for a long time, but I’m here for a good time. 

Sunshine: Oh, I love it, right. And it’s almost like

you’re a Game Master. Like you get to set the tone of the game that you’re you’re in. So like raising the vibration of the room, or like, let’s be really honored, utterly destroying it, if you so chose to do so as well. 


AmaJean: Yeah, exactly like a choice because a better term might be amplifying the vibration in a room. So it’s kind of like whatever the vibration is, when I’m in it, I will make it louder. So throughout my life, I’ve noticed like when there’s like a party vibe with Big Love and vulnerability and joy, people are like, you’re the best. And I’m like, Cool, thanks. And when the room is awkward and tense and stressed people are like, You’re the worst get out and I’m like, Oh, okay. Because I amplify that’s just like, I almost don’t even have to do or say anything. If I’m just there. It happens. And I’ve been like navigating, trying to like, understand that and, you know, take responsibility for that.

Devin: Here’s a fun thing to chew on.

Sunshine: Yeah, go for it.

Devin: You’re the reason why

AmaJean: Whoa, that’s super meta, Devin.

Sunshine: The mindful mage. Yes. That’s so good.

AmaJean: I think I’m gonna write that on my, you write that on my fucking mirror.

Devin: In both of those examples. People made you the reason why. 

Sunshine: you’re spot on and both of those examples meaning if you’re amplifying it up or amplifying it down whichever way it is like yeah, they’re, they’re in essence putting it on you.

Devin: And that’s just a role. Just like any other thing. Yeah. Any answer you give to that question? Basically, I need more information to answer that question. I’m being honest. You know, what do you do? Do you mean what do I do for a living? Yeah, by what do I do for a living? Do you mean? What do I do with my life? Or what do I do to earn money? Oh, that one? Okay. 


“Here’s what I do to earn money sometimes. Here’s what I don’t do to earn money. Well, okay, I don’t earn any money. Oh. Hey, why are you asking me that question anyway, do you just want to reflect off of me so that you can either validate or invalidate your experience to further the stories that you’re telling about yourself? Okay, I think I’m not going to talk to you anymore. Because this just got way too deep for my self esteem.”


It’s like, this is like, these kinds of conversations, what are we all we’re all so surface level. So much of the time, and it’s fun. It can be fulfilling to come up for a breath of fresh air. But not when you spend so much time underwater that you’ve grown gills and flippers. It doesn’t feel good anymore to be on the surface for too long. Gasping for connection to the deeper cosmic truth that I live. That I feel in my Soma. So maybe that applies to some of our listeners as well. It’s okay to be deep. Okay to be deep. okay to not connect with people on that surface level of of societal chit chat about what I do for a living?

Sunshine: I just heard it’s okay to say I don’t care to answer that question. It is completely okay. Like, could you ask me something deeper? I don’t know. Like, what’s my what’s my philosophy on past lives? Let’s start there.

AmaJean: We’ll just even like, what do you love? You know.


Devin: Yeah. What do you do to be joyful? Wouldn’t it wouldn’t it be greatest? If people if that was one of the first introductory questions that people ask what do you do for joy? What do you do to be joyful in your life? It’s like, isn’t that what we actually want to be experiencing? Joy? That’s what we want to have as Joy Not, not more money. Because it’s like, what do you do means what do you do for a living means? How do you earn money? I want people to start asking, how do you be joyful? Right, instead of how you earn money?


Sunshine: Yeah. We’re gonna start that. US it can start with us three, right. And then every listener, get rid of that damn. Like, what do you do for a living? Or what did you do? You know, just generic today, or how was your like, what did you do that, you know, filled you with joy yesterday? You know, what’s the most joyful thing that you know you have going on in your life right now? Right, ask deeper questions where you’re actually trying to get to know the individual and the soul. Right, rather than trying to label them.


I’ve got this weird thing that’s popped up in my head a couple of days, and it popped up again, as we’re talking around, like, so I live in the hometown of Henry Ford, right? You know, the gentleman that created the production line, right? A huge proponent of the Industrial Revolution, like literally, you know, if you could like, take our take yourself back to like, who invented the grind. And it’s going to be these gentlemen, back in the early 1900s, like Henry Ford and Thomas Edison that were trying to bring these beautiful inventions that were literally going to revolutionize the world, right? Electricity in every home, an automobile, you know, available. 


And I wonder how much of like, the labeling and the judgment really came out of our societies. Evolution and how, like, literally, I mean, even even Sigmund Freud, all of the all the big names, cite psychiatrist or psychologist now all around the exact same time how we, you know, perfect storm to start evolving, you know, the industry, and exploring, you know, human psychology and the first way how, I guess when I’m trying to get it, I don’t think it’s a surprise that we’re in an in a personal identity crisis most of the time, right, until you have stepped into your spiritual journey. You’ve, you’ve been defining yourself by what we’re told to do for work, and how we’re told we’re supposed to be by the psychiatrist that has come before us.

Devin: Because we’ve been taught that we need to earn our living, which sort of, at a perhaps unconscious level, translates to earning my right to live or just to be here to exist, earning your related earn my badges, earned my stripes, earn my labels so I can belong, because that’s the only way I can actually feel like I belong is if I wear the right labels.

Sunshine: I do think society’s is changing. I think there are a lot of us that are waking up to know that the label doesn’t really matter at the end of the day. Yep. So I introduced I’m Devin, I’m curious, is there anything you would like to tap into to maybe see your help on G and explore this question beyond just the I mean, I thought the why was it phenomenal? Like you are the why? That was intense. Anything else that you wanted to explore with AmaJean today?

Devin: Well, AmaJean . It seems to me like you feel fairly clear at this moment? And anything we talk about or explore between now and the end of this episode would simply be for funsies? I don’t, I don’t really think there’s anything that needs to be figured out.

AmaJean: Yeah, I think you guys caught me on a good day. For one thing. But also, you know, even on a bad day, I think I actually have, like that underlying foundational awareness of like, I don’t really have to have an answer that I could write up into an essay. I don’t, that is not the point. And I really am in my heart. Okay with that.

Sunshine: I think that’s beautiful. I mean, I often you know, as a just a psychic medium, but a spiritual advisor. You know, in Devon, maybe you even ask this analogy, maybe, you know, people often ask this question, like, you know, what is the meaning of life or, you know, why am I here, and I, I’m gonna call out because you, you did state it in your notes and like, we’re kind of dancing around it, and we’re talking about it, but I’m gonna make it real clear and succinct. We’re here to live. We are here to embrace every single opportunity that the universe gifts us. We’re here to listen To learn to explore, to love, right? We’re here to live. Now, what you experience while you live is a totally different question. But as far as why we’re here, it’s to live.

AmaJean: Yeah. And to add on that I feel like you know, then the question could be like, Well, what is to live, like, what is living and what is not living? And I think that we can all like, look at various examples of people who, you know, are very stuck, and say like, well, you’re not really living. And this is something that has become very vibrantly obvious and true for me very recently, after a long conversation I had with a friend the other day, we’re here to face the truth. And that’s what living is, is just to face what is with courage, and with trust in the universe, with trust that the universe is love. And that like the collective is going to keep you supported, because you’re already woven into the web and cannot be removed. 

And this came up because we were talking about a similar experience that we’re having, that is quite challenging to just face and accept as being just true just is. And she brought up a story that she had around her birth experiences, where her first child was born unexpectedly by C section. And that was not her desire. And she was pregnant for a second time and had decided that her heart was really asking her to have a home birth, and through multiple months leading up to the birth, she would have these moments of crisis of like, what if I’m making the wrong decision? Like, what if I’m being foolish? And this is not safe? Like, what if I die? What if my baby dies? All these questions coming up about like, could she live with herself with the regrets anytime she would get herself too stuck in those questions, and turn towards what like the world tells her was like the safer option to go to the hospital and be very closely supervised. She just noticed this feeling of sinking and tightness in her and as soon as she turned back towards the homebirth, she felt open and aligned. 


And so she said, I recognized and this will stick with me forever. Because she said, I recognize that by turning towards homebirth. I was turning towards what just was for me, it just is. And I was like, Oh my God. Because as I’ve been dealing with this thing in my life, I’ve been like, it just is, it just is it’s not convenient. It’s not fun. It’s not what I would have chosen, it’s but it just is and I’m not gonna lie about it. I’m not going to turn away from it. I’m not going to hide from it. I’m not going to suppress the thing in me. I’m going to let it be what it is in trust and in faith. And I think so much of life is like not lived by people turning away from what is out of fear out of ego, uncertainty, overwhelm, you know, you can list all these words, but when you turn towards what my friend Catherine said, You’re turning towards God. And I was like, of course, like God, I Am that I Am. God is what it is. And when we turn towards what is it doesn’t matter what anybody else judges it. Or if it’s judged to be like, immoral, or stupid, or weird or confusing or wrong. If it just is and you’re turning towards it. You’re living. Yeah. I love it. That’s what’s really alive for me right now.

Devin: I have a question. Do you have any advice for those listening right now? On how to sift through the various layers of what is to find what is true for me. Because I can look outside of myself at a situation that’s all around me. That is in the way that it is and look within me. And notice if I have enough awareness do so how I feel about it. What I would like to change about it what I want instead. And that also is Yeah. So what which, which isn’t this and how to follow it.

AmaJean: That it’s always the internal isness for me, like you know the example I gave about my friend. She was also turning to Word something that that very much is like the social expectation evidence, the, you know, whatever you want to say, that would point her towards doing what was not for her, like, you know, it’s kind of confusing because like, theoretically she could have chosen anything and that would have been what was. And so that’s why I’m saying like the internal knowing like she knew what was for her she could feel it. When she put her thoughts towards one option. She felt the fear and the tightness and the frustration, and the sadness and the closing. And when she turned toward what was for her, she felt the trust and the openness and the willingness to leap. And I think that probably the central human struggle is trusting ourselves, which is essentially just trusting the universe, because we all complete fractals of the entire universe.

Sunshine: You are literally putting it out there on the gene. And I just want to highlight, you know, if you are as a human being in touch with how things feel within your body, right, you described this like tightness, this constriction, this wanting to curl up versus this expansion and openness, right? It’s amazing. When you start to pay attention to the physical body and listen to it, it will answer those questions for you. 

AmaJean: And it’s not easy, it can be so hard because you can will often constrict against what is out of fear because you don’t trust yourself. So it’s like, this is why I think we incarnate so many freaking times because it takes lifetimes to get it right to like recognize it consistently. And be willing to trust it consistently to different things. So you can finally reach a point where you’re like, Okay, I think I know what is for me, what is for me, what is God for me? 


But do I have the courage to turn towards it into like, be honest about it with the whole world, like let the whole world see me turning towards it, and accept the judgment and the stories that they’re going to project on me in response to me turning towards what is that’s a whole other task. Like, this is all it is right? Like, like I was saying, like this is living? Like you were saying, sunshine, we’re here to live. This is what living is.

Sunshine: All right. I mean, I don’t know if I’ll leave you to see AmaJean. I mean, this has been very beautiful. Do you have you know, Devin asked a really great last question. Is there anything that you would like to kind of wrap and share with our, our listeners or audience, those folks that are out there? And maybe they’ve got that same exact question? Why am I here any anything you’d like to share with them as they mentor on their own journey.

AmaJean: The thing that’s popping into my head is meditation. For a long time, I like I have ADHD. I thought like meditation, it’s just like, not my thing. Like, I tried to do that. And I’ve got the squirrel mind that goes everywhere. And I feel like I’m not really getting anything out of it. You know, but like, I think just even letting that be letting that be what it is, and accepting that is a vital part of the process. It was through meditation that I was awakened. And I did not see that coming. Because I was not a master meditator. I had really only started meditating about 10 days before, my like, regularly before my whole, like Kundalini was awoken. And all those things happened. Like I now see our typical, like the heartbeat, getting fast, the pressure under the skin all throughout the body. 


It was very wild, I never knew what it was, never saw it coming, didn’t panic when it happened, which tells me that my energetic body had wisdom of having experienced this before that my conscious mind did not have. But you know, just like trust in taking the time to just be with myself. And I think guided meditation is really helpful for people who feel like they’re just not good at meditation, like starting by doing guided meditation. Because it was really through guided meditation that I had my first breakthrough was something really profound and connected deeply with my primary spirit guide, through guided meditation that allowed the space for that. 


So yeah, just like giving yourself time to be with yourself. Even if you feel like you’re bad at it or you’re not getting anything out of it the other times you’ve tried. Just like there’s just so much value in just giving yourself that respect, like making that sacrifice. It’s almost like making a spiritual sacrifice for yourself as an entity to take the time to meditate regardless of what comes of it. So that’s the thing that popped into my head immediately when you asked.

Sunshine: I love it so much. I love it so much. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart on a gene for joining us today. This has been a phenomenal episode and I know that there are there are men I’m the beside tingles down there are a number of individuals that are going to stumble stumble across this and resonate very much. So with this topic and what you had to share here today. So thank you so much for bringing your beautiful soul here to join us connecting with us and all of our listeners. I you know, I typically wrap up Devin, any you know, thank you I know we don’t get it’s such a bummer. I’m like, I know normally wait for his like, looks on his face and like the ink was Yeah, it’d be inquisitive. So anything else

that you’d like to share? Before we we wrap for the day?

AmaJean: Well, actually, I feel inspired to guide a meditation to close this episode, if we feel we have the time and space for that.

Devin: Great. Pretty short one. So as we began, the opening, higher self, our ritual. Let’s find ourselves in a comfortable posture in place, once again. Let’s start with the eyes open. And maybe you have experience with meditation for maybe you have no experience with meditation before this moment. Maybe you’ve tried to meditate. And as a gene has expressed, you’ve discovered, your mind is like a squirrel flitting around, looking for nuts, hiding them in various places, while you are just trying to focus and quiet your mind. Well, as you intentionally relax your body. At this moment, I would like to inform you that meditation is not inherently about quieting the mind. A quiet mind might be an essential consequence of your meditation practice. But having an active mind during meditation does not mean anything about how good at meditating you are. 


Meditation is about directing your attention. At least mindfulness meditation is and that’s the kind of meditation that I have the most experience with. So even right now you’re meditating because you are directing your attention primarily on the sound of my voice and the words that I’m speaking and the meaning of those words, and how that lands for you in your awareness. This is meditation if you call it meditation, and you intend for this to be a practice of directing your attention than it is meditation. So let’s take one deep breath in through the nose. Hold it at the top for just one second and exhale slowly through the mouth are your eyes still open? Or have they closed? Eyes open the eyes and look around. 


Let’s think about this. This is this is what is this? This is, this is an experience you’re having let’s close the eyes this is this is an experience I’m having and let’s ask ourselves this question why am I here? Notice what arises for you. Notice all the thoughts that happen all the stories and beliefs that appear all the while simply allowing this to happen and simply observing it happen with your awareness. Why am I here? We’re not looking for an answer. We’re simply asking the question and observing what happens. Why am I here? You might not like some of the thoughts that appear, you might like very much some of the thoughts that appear. Just observe. 


Allow your mind to think whatever it thinks and allow yourself to feel content, simply asking that question and observing Why am I here let’s take one deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth imagine blowing that question out and the way and let’s end this meditation with a statement. I am here. Notice what comes up for you. I am here you can place one hand over your heart, another hand over your belly. I am here. I am here and place your hands gently over your face. Over on your cheeks and your eyes. I am here finally let’s place the hands firmly on the thighs might even like to squeeze your thighs a little bit. I am here and imagining yourself like a flower popping open to greet the sun. You can open your eyes. Give a little shake. Deep breath in the sky, you are here.

Sunshine: I am Oh my goodness. Wow. Wow, what a beautiful day. What a beautiful life with beautiful friends. I have a beautiful family. With all of that I am. I am just going to say thank you again, AmaJean. Devin, thank you for that delicious meditation. I hope everybody adored and enjoyed it and you need to reach out and check out Devin. This is something he is phenomenal at. So feel please feel free if you enjoyed it to check them out and see what else he’s got out there. But we’re going to wrap This up with the same set thing that we’ve been seeing every single podcast thus far, which is I hope that each and every one of you find your own path, follow your own path into your own deepest spirituality. So much love from me, Sunshine to all of the listeners out there and Devin, 


Devin: Farewell.

Sunshine: Alright, take care, and until next time.

AmaJean: This was awesome.

Get to know the co-hosts Sunshine and Devin

Rev. Devin Ryback, also known as The Mindful Mage, is a Personal Coach and Certified Hypnotherapist who helps people awaken their true magick and create powerful personal connections with the Divine in all things. Combining mindfulness, hypnosis, and over a decade of spiritual practice and experience, Devin shows up as a wise guide on the healing path for all who seek to know and be who they really are. Learn more at TheMindfulMage.com.

Sunshine is a Psychic Medium, Soul Healer, Spiritual Advisor, High Priestess, Reiki Master, Recovering Alcoholic and founder of Sunshine Readings. Her passion is helping others learn how to step into their shadows so they can uncover their own magick and psychic gifts needed to remove any energetic blocks to their soul’s enlightenment. She is the Creatrix of Illuminate, The Unschool of Witchcraft. This transformational program includes Sunshine’s divine-inspired gifts in 7 different monthly workshops and 1:1 access to her. In addition to owning and operating Sunshine Readings, Sunshine is also an award-winning software product manager and business operations expert that is helping corporations revolutionize their internal structure and processes to adopt a more innovative culture. In her spare time, you will find Sunshine dancing, cooking, painting, and hanging out with her five kitties in the suburbs of Detroit, Michigan.

 “Only when we know our own darkness can we sit in the darkness with others.” – Pema Chodron

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