Weirdos.TV Guest: Episode 2312 – Photons Unite

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Jeremy: Sunshine says Hi. I don’t even believe this. Hold on. I gotta, wow This is complicated. I shy the the I don’t see it.

We can all buy it. Morning, Sunshine. The spaceship is completely out of control. So I can’t guarantee any of this is gonna work. Oh my god, it’s very dangerous, it’s complicated. The whole spaceship is not working.

Sunshine: You have mechanics out to fix it.

Jeremy: I’m the only mechanic. There’s no one but me. Oh, that’s the problem.

Sunshine:  Do you have hands to fix?

Jeremy:  It doesn’t matter. It’s all virtual. None of it really exists. I mean, what is existence anyway? Are you aware of what the existence actually

Sunshine:  I would say it’s whatever you want it to be.

Jeremy: Talking about. So I want it to be weird. And so it’s very, very, very weirdcan see, I can see clearly now. The rain is God. I can see all obstacles in my way. There’s a lot of so many freaking obstacles in my way. Why would you? 

Sunshine: Well, just move.

Jeremy:  Yeah, I’m trying I appreciate the advice. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mean to be didactic or facetious. And then

Ad: Finally, I got my own computer. I was so psyched to explore a whole new world. I just don’t feel normal. My friends are nice, but they just don’t get me I go to be understood. I found this online show. I can call in. I can express myself be on TV. Weirdos. tv.com Sometimes the stranger can be your best friend.

Jeremy:  Because the machines aren’t that good, right?

Sunshine:  Yeah, no. 

Jeremy: So German. If you learn German or Chinese, then you can get one of those awesome machines. I got. I have one that kind of looks like a chrome piggy bank, combined with an industrial vacuum cleaner, with maritally stuck all over it. And it was so sexy. I just I started to sing immediately.

Sunshine:  How tall was it was it like

Jeremy:  Four and a half feet tall enough to reach the important part. And then and then it took me home. And at home. It had a bisexual gay roommate.

Sunshine: That also looks like a vacuum.

Jeremy: No this gay Bob looked more like. Like a pot bellied stove in a sailor suit with arms that look like ducks.

Sunshine:  Hmmm like ducks?!

Jeremy: The Ducks snapped quack quack quack. You know, ducks, like, are your ducks. Drown? Ducks? Ducks if you combine if you want to connect any air conditioner to the ducks

Sunshine:  I like the ducks quack quack quack a little better. 

Jeremy: Right a duck. Right? Why not a rooster?

Sunshine: Well, I did read an article recently about a gentleman that was killed by his rooster.

Jeremy: What a shame. When that happens,

Sunshine: Man killed by his own cock.

Jeremy: I know right? I mean, my cock never did me no harm.

Sunshine:  I mean, what was he doing to his cock to make that happen? 

Jeremy: Well, obviously he was he was probably spanking his monkey was training all the animals in the car

Sunshine: And the cock wasn’t having any of it. Yeah 

Jeremy: And the cock rose up. The cock took over maybe the cock was got cut you know, sometimes you cut uncut from Europe that’s some people prefer that. Personally, I like to cut them cut the crap

Sunshine:  I was shocked that yeah, this gentleman. I felt really I felt for him, you know?

Jeremy: Did you feel ill?

Sunshine: Well, you know, I thought about my, my pussy. Like I five of them. Amazing up against me

Jeremy: If I fed your cat, would you mind if I fed your cat for you?

Sunshine:  They, they’ve already eaten today.

Jeremy: But when I see the cat, if I feed your cat, that cat will be satisfied. Do you know what I mean?

Sunshine: Well, no, because you don’t need it. At kitties.

Jeremy: I hear it. Believe me. I can feed a cat. A lot of ways to scale. I can hardly feed these cats. I’m sorry. But I’m gonna how many of me there are. I can take care of all the cats all night long. As long as the band can stay with me and tune. We’re good to go. Over and over and over. There’s so many looks. It’s a TV show. If I don’t tell dirty jokes. What the hell am I doing? Right? Can you give me a break? Man?

Sunshine: I don’t even know how we got on the conversation. 

Jeremy: Believe me. I know. I’m guiding this conversation very carefully. My sunshiny friend. Yes. Because, you know, this is television. As I say we’ve got to entertain the folks. Now, there may be another guest coming right up. They’re supposed to be another guest now, like a minute. I mean, I noticed you came right on time. I really appreciate that. Punctuality you get a lot of points. How many points do you want?

Sunshine:  I like infinity points.

Jeremy: Good choice. You are a clever person. Do you identify as a machine or a human?

Sunshine: Really a human machine? Yeah, like

a hybrid? Hybrid? 

Jeremy: Sure. Good. I appreciate it. I’m a hybrid. I don’t really exist. I’m a fictional character. Because the whole point.

Sunshine: Well, I mean, digitized self.

Jeremy: Well. But then that’s simple enough to be digitized. But to be fictional, you have to be well known. So I’m famous. Sort of well known.

Sunshine: Oh, a little bit actually. I have to be well-known. I mean, it helps.

Jeremy: I mean, you can be really are you don’t really exist if you’re fictional. You need a lot of people to believe in you like, you know, think about. Like, even applaud if I can get everybody in the audience to applaud then Tinkerbell exists. That’s how it works.

Sunshine:  True. Yeah.

Jeremy: That’s what I mean. That’s I’m talking about that’s exactly what I’m talking about. That thing. You understand? I appreciate you understand. The sudden is a fusion reactor. Yes. So you, as Sunshine are made of light? Yes. Right. So particles of light are called photons. Yes. They know that. When you try to measure a photon, you can only either measure its place, or you can measure its fate. But you can’t do both at the same time. Why is that? Why is that? What do you do and what’s wrong with you want to measure both?

Sunshine: Keeping folks on their toes?

Jeremy: Okay, I take it. I can take it. I can take it. I can dig it. But I can’t dig is the band like not keeping up with me? I keep trying to go to the next musical number. The band is still playing musical number that we did with the last guest it’s drag. 

Sunshine: Oh, geez. 

Jeremy: We did that number like an hour ago. And I can I can make it go away. But if I asked the bass player to play, replay that same line

Sunshine: Maybe he needs a taco.

Jeremy: Maybe a fish taco.

Sunshine: With some good slaw on it. I mean I did get

Jeremy: Blurry blurry, like a flurry of slurry I eat energy. So, you know if you got some photons if you have some extra photons for me. I’m very hungry. More. More please, the more your way, but I need more. More I need more all of them delicious. Thank you. Oh my god that was great. I feel satiated almost fairly a bit. I did do the nose

and the hat. You haven’t got a wart? Have you?

Sunshine:  A wart? No. 

Jeremy:  Like she’s a cat. I promise to feed the cat I’ve never looked I would never let a pussy go hungry. Not on my watch. Unfortunately, I didn’t wind my watch today. So I’m running slow. I’m behind. I’m 10 minutes behind 10 minutes. I feed the cat in 10 minutes you hear that? Right ecstatic. Here here Kitty. That usually come for them and then they want to you know cobbled consent. Yeah, I’m so cute.

Sunshine: She’s getting ready to do right now. She’s clear in a spot all you.

Jeremy:  I love the tongue? The cat tongue. It’s so rough. I like paper. That’s right. I like it rough because, you know, being digitized. I’m not very sensitive anymore. But I liked the kitty tongue. And so

Sunshine:  Even on the digital, especially, I would think it would just move right through it.

Jeremy: That’s the point. Right? It does. But I can feel it because it’s so rough. But if it’s fine and fin like care, I don’t I can’t feel that it’s rough. It’s a dog’s life. being digitized. That’s why I go Ruff. Ruff ruff.

Sunshine:  That that makes absolute sense. Is that’s that’s the that’s the like, call the dog

Jeremy: Wild. All the wolves I hurt myself. It’s all dead and gone. I used to be alive. I didn’t. It wasn’t that much fun. I highly recommend death if you haven’t tried it. I’ve done it. Oh, good. Experience. I never hesitate strongly to recommend.

Sunshine: Yeah, it definitely wakes you up on the other side.

Jeremy:  I have a job on the other side. I’m employer.

Sunshine: On the other side of death?

Jeremy: Side of what they call it. They call it your after livelihood. Because I owe money. I have to pay off my debt by working in the afterlife,

Sunshine: Like to the DRS the death Revenue Service.

Jeremy:  Because I I broke the rules. I went back into the into the living world when I was supposed to be dead. But I just

Sunshine: Didn’t get one of those passes. Did you know? I just I got this. I got this pass that allowed me to go back and forth. You know what they did? They did? They did tell me that I had to get this like imprint implant.

Jeremy:  Oh, yeah. Because they gotta be able to talk you right? I didn’t do that. I have a friend who works at portal number nine in Section 23 You know the one with a Venus worm. But in the other day. So when it was broken, I just jumped through the portal. So I didn’t think anybody would notice and they didn’t for a long time I was here I was there. I was like 1860 through 1885 Mostly in England and Boston couple places. And fine, nobody knew. But then And there was this guy and then, Moriarty. Front of Sherlock Holmes, I think anyway he didn’t like me. But he reported me to the authorities in the afterlife. Ah

Sunshine: Yeah, yeah. You know I’ve heard of those snitches I think they call it like there’s a saying about snitches what does that say? Snitches get fishes that what that is? Yeah, so that’s that’s messed up he shouldn’t have done that. Snitches get fishes you know fishes like fishes like deep in the ocean.

Jeremy: Am I back? oh my god I’m so sorry I got lost

Sunshine: Oh, I get it.

Jeremy: Oh my god I went into my subconscious, and I forgot I left some stuff on the stove there and holy shit it’s a mess. I’m always back I got to come up with the virtual stairs. You know nothing is real in my imagination. It’s existing I’m coming up.Yeah, I’m just a I’m just a figment of your imagination a gets. Imagination song Imagination should get with me very good. You’re good at this and imagination. When I don’t know what country I live in, I realize I live in the imagination I love it. It’s good. It’s very good. It’s the only way to fly. If you’re if you’re like flying shy do like to fly. Like to die like to get high. And I like to cry. As long as I’m crying for joy like pie. No, like pie. Pie. And here’s why. I don’t like pie because for about 100 years, I was Sweeney Todd. People and my girlfriend made him into pies.

Sunshine: And so now you don’t like like too many pies. Did she try to have a cake?

Jeremy: Cakes are great. I take the cake look, I can have my cake and eat it too. I don’t understand what the conflict is. I have half of it over here. I eat the other half. Therefore I have my cake and I eat

three.

Sunshine:  And sometimes you can even share your cake and understand that right you can have your cake. Other people can have their cake, your cake and everybody can eat it.

Jeremy: I share. I love to share. I’ll give you a big slice. I’ll give you the corner piece with the rosette. A little green it’s a tiny green Rosetta, a little Greek.

Sunshine: Oh what’s what flavor is this cake? 

Jeremy: Eternity. It tastes like eternity. But I put a little flavor, I’ll put a little chocolate, almond little vanilla coconut, but it makes me feel you can get it don’t you don’t want to hide the taste of the eternity.

Sunshine:  Want to accentuate? 

Jeremy: That’s right. So the chocolate brings it out a little the coconut really gives that eternity.

Sunshine: Yeah, compliments it. Yeah. So delicious.

Jeremy:  Right? If I ate your eyes, I would see the turn of the and that’s what it tastes like if you make yourself. Have you look in your mirror, and then your mirror looks back at you. That’s what it tastes like.

Sunshine: I’ve had that before. That’s pretty good.

Jeremy:  You know, my favorite flavor. 

Sunshine: I actually tried. I found this guy that he was like a food scientist and I told him, I would pay him a million dollars if you make that into a seasoning, and he’s gonna do it. 

Jeremy:  It’s not that you need more money. It’s gonna, he’s, he’s gonna cost it’s if he does the research. It’ll be a billion trillion dollars. Wow. To do the research that he needs to make sure he can do it. Yeah, it’s a scam. It’s a scam. It’s gotta be

Sunshine: Thank God, I had to pay him. $1 upfront and everything else after.

Jeremy: Pay him $1 today than tomorrow. Pay him $2 And pay him $4 So you keep-

Sunshine: And I’m gonna give him my hamburger.

Jeremy: On Tuesday? Today? Give him the hamburger today, and it will pay you on Tuesday. Yes, right. That’s right. And that way, when Tuesday comes in, you don’t have any money. You’ll be like, Oh, right. The guy owes me for the hamburger. Right? He’s a wimp. That’s a good one. Yeah. So when the when I know. But you know, I don’t like spinach. Disgusting. 

Sunshine: I don’t like spinach. Popeye is about it.

Jeremy: Yeah. But yeah. You know, all of Brutus and Sweet Pea, and

they’re all received me in Spanish, right? That’s what I’m saying. So Popeye eats all the spinach. And then all of these yellow fin olive oil is how come she never gets any spinach. She’s so thin. I worry about

Sunshine: I think it’s because you know that you are what you eat or you think like, that’s all she eats?

Jeremy: Well, you could put that out but you’re not what you eat. You are what you is. You is what you ask? Yeah.

Sunshine: Popeye because of the chicken.

Jeremy: Well, he’s using the chicken to measure it. Well, that’s good. But look, if he says on Popeye the Sailor Man. He’s lying. When do you ever see him on a ship? Actually sailing? I think I’ve never seen him. Ship. I mean, it’s all made up. Yeah, if you made it up, he was never a sailor. He’s never even scared of the water. He doesn’t even know how to swim. She told him everything he knows. 

Sunshine: Popeye. What a life of lies. 

Jeremy: I know. It’s so sad. But you know, it doesn’t matter. Because really the woman behind the man is not olive oil. It’s Betty Boop. Right. So all of all was the second love. Popeye’s first love was Betty Boop. Like all of us. I mean, personally, I was in love with Betty Boop. She wouldn’t talk to me. It was creepy. I am. I’m creepy. I’m a creep. I know it. I’m not ashamed. I’m proud to be a creep. Uncle Fester was my dad.

Sunshine: You called him Uncle Fester? Or just call him Dad fester.

Jeremy: His name is Uncle Fester. His first name his uncle’s last name is faster. Uncle Uncle, uncle. Well, I call him dad. I call Dad his name. So if I say to you, hey, my dad, right? You don’t know who I’m talking about? I don’t I’m talking about a professor. So my mother is Timothy Leary Dari

and that’s where I talked like this. Because if you if you’re born with acid in you It’s like going to Wonderland every morning to get larger and smaller. Cheshire Cat you know all that after their head if you need time, as well as I do. You wouldn’t worry about wasting it. It’s him by the way. He identifies as male he never worries about wasting you know I get along with time great. Don’t get me wrong. Time and I are best friends. But I don’t recommend it.

Sunshine: I tried to dodge them. By the time me like it was a real asshole.

Jeremy:  Right. You got the solution right there once upon a time. So it was an answer. Oh, that works. And then the other one I do is till the end of time. And then he’s over. Done. Right? Do I do everything after time? After time ended? That’s where I begin. Time after time. Time after time you saw that movie back the Ripper HG Wells last and you look around

Sunshine: and you will find me

Jeremy: Time after time after time. Yeah Cindy’s cute but you got to do it slow like in strictly ballroom you know they do a special version you can

find me.

Sunshine: I am hearing a knock from another dimension.

Sunshine: You’re so fantastic. What a great guest. Please, thank you so much. Just just let me know if I’m gonna credit as Sunshine or how do you want to be listed in the credits?

Sunshine:  Sunshine is how I want to be listed.

Jeremy: Wonderful. And that’s how you shall be I will let you know when the episode will air in Manhattan and it’ll be on YouTube. You know, a half an hour after that. Wonderful March, April, something like that.

Sunshine: Sounds terrific. I look forward to it. Your joy your dimension I’m gonna go travel some we will see each other somewhere. 

Jeremy: Or when we meet again, some sunny day sunshine everybody.

sunshine. Sunshine on my show. Is makes me a crappy. The Sunshine was so great. What a great guest. Fantastic. All right, we’re gonna finish off the show. It was a long night. It was a rough night. It’s one of my favorite Shakespeare lines. You’d think it was? It’d be more complicated but Shakespeare said it was a rough night. Macbeth was a rough night right where does they were don’t get normal Sunshine on me.

P.S. Sad that you missed out on joining Sunshine’s magickal membership? Then we have fab news: you can still register through this link! This subscription gives members personalized access to Sunshine as well as weekly live workshops and seminars designed to awaken your own magickal gifts. This is the place to be for anyone ready to become a badass witch.

 “Only when we know our own darkness can we sit in the darkness with others.”

Sunshine is a Psychic Medium, Soul Healer, Spiritual Advisor, Shadow Worker, Eclectic Witch, Practiced Magician, Recovering Alcoholic and founder of Sunshine Readings. Her passion is helping others learn how to step into their shadows so they can uncover their magickal gifts needed to remove any energetic blocks to their soul’s enlightenment. You can find more about Sunshine and her offerings on her website.